Inept Criminal Stories It's all True... Unbelievable Crimes


Our communities have many social, financial and emotional problems that influence the rise in criminal activity. These factors have challenged many to adapt or change their circumstances to work hard and live as law abiding citizens. On the other hand, there are some citizens that refuse to change their lives. They’re unwilling to put out genuine effort to make an honest living. The offenders are compelled to exert their power over others and obtain immediate gratification by engaging in law breaking behavior of abuse, murder, robbery and burglary.

Criminals spend much time scheming and planning out their plots. The ultimate goal is to outsmart, victimize and find an easy way out of an honest living. Offenders attend to every detail of their crime. To avoid “the law” they plan on the smooth execution of their ploys, not a backfiring monkey wrench, since getting caught leads to arrest and a felony record. Bumbling through a ploy results in ridiculous and outrageous outcomes… such as these amazing true story crimes:

Snorting Ashes

On December 15, 2010 in Marion County, Florida, four teenagers, Jose Diaz Marrero, 19; Matrix Andaluz, 18, and a duo of 17-year-olds, burglarized the home of Holli Tencza. They were in search of drugs and valuables to satisfy their drug addiction. The thieves ransacked the residence and took jewelry, electronics and three containers filled with a powdery substance. The crooks believed they found a mother-load of either heroin or cocaine.

The excited teenage offenders returned home with their find and began snorting lines of the substance. Over a period of four days, the thieves questioned the potency of their drug. They didn’t get the expected high that the powerful drug usually delivers.

Through a local news report, they learned that the powdery substance was not cocaine, but the cremated remains of two Great Danes and a deceased person. Freaked out by the the idea of inhaling fragments of dead beings, they discarded the urns and its contents.

Two of the three urns and its ashes were later discovered in Magic Lake of Silver Springs Shores, Florida.

The teens were later charged for the burglary. The third urn remains missing.

Mistletoe Misery

On December 5, 2011, in a suburb of Atlanta, Bill Robinson of Buckhead, Georgia was arrested for illegally shooting down mistletoe from trees behind a mall. He was harvesting mistletoe as Christmas decorations for a party he was attending.

Bill Robinson was not in the backroad wilderness of Georgia. He was running errands in a populated area of town. He always carried his shotgun in his vehicle. Robinson was unwilling to purchase his mistletoe from a nursery, when he could easily shoot it down from the nearby trees. Remaining behind the buildings, Mr. Robinson justified firing at the mistletoe with his shotgun.

Concerned with the sound of gunfire, local business owners reported the disturbance. A police officer caught Mr. Robinson firing his weapon and questioned him.

During his questioning, Bill Robinson told police that rural Southerners traditionally bring down the parasitic holiday plant with a shotgun. He disclosed that he had shot down mistletoe, in this fashion, numerous times.

He appeared before a judge, found guilty, jailed overnight and fined. His offense was firing a deadly weapon within city limits. His fine was more than a $5.00 bag of mistletoe.

Mr. Robinson attended his Christmas party without his prized mistletoe.

Indecency at a Scanner

On June 22, 2016, Christian Fisher was charged for indecent exposure at the local Quality Food Store, in Seattle, Washington. The 31 year old offender place his exposed genitalia on the store’s self checkout scanner.

To capture a surprise reaction, he called over a female employee to the register. Fisher enjoyed the reaction of the traumatized employee. Laughing at the shocked and grossed out female, a male security guard intervened the situation.

The stunned guard reported that Fisher stood at the register without covering up his penis. Law enforcement officials were called to the store to file a report and apprehend Fisher. Before an arrest could be made, he and his genitalia quickly left the scene.

If leaving a contaminated scanner wasn’t enough, Christian Fisher returned to the crime scene. In an attempt to “86ed” him from the store, the security guard had a verbal and physical confrontation. He fled again from the store. Police officers later found Fisher blocks away.

Christian Fisher was arrested for obstruction, assault and indecent exposure.

Sleeping on the Job

In January 2013 police answered a call from a residence in Lady Lake, Florida. The owner reported that her house was burglarized. The suspect was in her home with some of her stolen items. When the police arrived to investigate the allegations, 21 year old Domonique Pinkard was found asleep on the victim’s couch.

Domonique was awakened, frisked and questioned by police. During the search, the owner’s jewelry was found in his pockets. The interrogation revealed that Julian Evangelist was an accomplice in the crime. After thorough probing, he was questioned and arrested at a neighborhood house. The house was filled with the victim’s belongings.

Investigators were very curious of the thieve’s work style, Pinkard’s napping and Julian’s rationale of not waking his partner in crime. Evangelist revealed that as he was transferred a television, clothing and other valuables to a neighborhood house, he noticed that Domonique had fallen asleep on the woman’s couch.

As Pinkard slept, Julian completed the task of removing the stolen items.

Pinkard disclosed to police that his exhaustion and “sleeping on the job,” stemmed from “working hard all day.” Like a good friend, Julian didn’t want to awaken his exhausted comrade.

Pinkard and Evangelist were arrested, jailed and charged for grand larceny.